Two days until Christmas but it doesn’t feel like Christmas, you know? My mind tells me that it is just this crazy year, and the mental state I've been in, but I’m honestly hoping that losing the Christmas spirit with age is just a thing for hallmark movies.

A lot has happened today and I am not even sure where to start. It has most definitely been a crazy past several days, that is for sure. I guess no better way to start than from the beginning. It is currently 2:30 Am, so I am technically talking about yesterday. That’s besides the point. Today we had an appointment at the police station to talk about my toxic home environment. The interview went great. I got to speak to a very nice cop, and we had a genuine human connection, and made such good conversation. I missed that. After the interview he took me to get my finger print taken, and I got to sign papers and things. I got asked for a form of ID or drivers license by the pretty woman at the front, and she seemed surprised when he mentioned that I was fifteen and didn't necessarily have a drivers license. He told me that I was the most diligent fifteen year old he had ever spoken to. It was pretty cool. We talked quite a bit on our faith, and he really liked how strong I was in it, which made me happy. I always try to find some way to bring Jesus into the conversation with everyone. He has a beautiful wife, and three children. I learned a lot about him just by talking to him for a couple hours, and it made me realize how sick I am of the form of conversations we have in my generation. I knew this man for 3 hours and I know his birthday, his dreams, his business, his goals, learned about his family, and he gave me a list of recommendations for Christian books and podcasts that changed his entire world. After this interview my friends wanted to hang out so I went with them. We watched the dumbest Christmas “scary” (not really scary) movie. We also went to Target and they pushed me around in a cart. It was cold but it was fun. We made a spam account where we can dump all of our pictures whenever we feel like it. Pretty cool.

I am absolutely exhausted. Its exactly 3am. I have been running nonstop today. I leave at 2:30 tomorrow so I am getting my grandmother to pick me up tomorrow morning. So Ill probably wake up to go with her, make sure I have everything, and then go back to sleep at her house. I am excited to have some really good bible time tomorrow in the car. And a definite nap or two. I didn’t get to read my bible today. I needed to prioritize God and do it immediately when I got home, but I just did so much packing and my mind has been so tired. I was listening to the coffee and bible time podcast last night and Taylor and Ashley (the hosts) were talking about how we end up self sabotaging ourselves by criticizing ourselves so much. They didn't discount discipline at all, in fact encouraged it. They just let me realize that I shouldn't beat myself up over everything. I need sleep. I have two things prewritten to upload while I am at my dads, and I may have some time to jot down some things as well. But if I don’t end up getting to write tomorrow, Merry Christmas, May our God be with you, and Jesus be the reason for your joy. Jesus loves you, I love you!

I love Jesus. I write whatever is on my mind. :)